Tuesday, September 6, 2011

They Can't Tear You Down

My next Lesson Post comes from someone who wants to remain anonymous (I'll call him John). He asks,

"How do I deal with all the negativity coming from those who want to tear me down? I'm working harder than I ever have, which is giving me more success than I've ever experienced. I'm finding it difficult to stay focused in the midst of all the negativity."

Unfortunately, this type of challenge is more prevalent than you'd expect. Striving for bigger and better sounds exciting, but it does come with a price to pay. Sometimes, the price is a lack of time with family or friends, but too often, you'll find yourself defending more than acting. You'll feel as if your positivity and need to separate from the pack is abnormal. The people who are trying to make you feel this way are doing so because they won't commit to pushing themselves past their own comfort zones. It's almost instinctive for them to feel the need to grab your foot as you pass, ripping it down to their level. The fact is, they do it because they lack the self confidence to reach for a higher plateau, themselves. Their jealousy of John's success leads them to verbally pull him down, hoping to cause him the same pain they feel inside. In their mind, his success only reaffirms their failure. 

While we're being torn from our climb, it's natural to want to attack back, and defend our actions. The best thing John can do is ... NOTHING. He needs to understand these negative, "self-pity talkers" are hurting on the inside. Instead of feeling anger, have empathy for them, realizing it's most likely not a personal attack on his journey. They feel powerless to do this type of growing, so in their warped sense of reality, mustn't allow anyone else to feel success. If John can eliminate his ego from this equation, he'll quickly realize he has all the power. They need him to continue his climb towards the top, because without him, they'll have nothing to complain about. 

No matter the situation in our lives, we have the choice to spin it into power and confidence. We choose our reactions and how they'll ultimately affect our daily path. Our thoughts create emotion, leading to specific action. It's this action that hands us our results. Focus, not only on what we tell ourselves, but how we communicate with others. If they're tearing us down, instead of becoming defensive, understand it's coming from a place of inner pain. Have sympathy for them, but keep moving forward. Keep fighting for your next level!

1% is a mindset that doesn't allow anyone or anything to dictate our journey. We're in control of how we choose to think. Choose wisely!

1 comment:

Rettakat said...

Funny... I thought I had left a comment here.

Those last two paragraphs are so powerful... and I've been dealing with something today that they address perfectly, just perfectly. I especially appreciated the reminder to take care how I respond back, and to remember what they are probably going through... thanks for this.